The mom of three welcomed Winter Mercy, her third child with husband Mario “Souleye” Treadyway on Aug. 8, and has been outspoken about the postpartum depression (PPD) she went through following the births of her two oldest children, Ever Imre, 8, and Onyx Solace, 3.
On Oct. 6, Alanis opened up about her third battle with the condition, saying she wasn’t sure if she would experience it this time, and the latest bout has taken different manifestations.
“There are so many tentacles to this experience,” she wrote, and went on to say she had fallen back into her old habit of “over-giving. Over-serving. Over-do-ing. Over-over-ing.” Normally, these would all be “lovely qualities” to any person, she said, except when done too much because they can’t be sustained.
“Recovery from childbirth (as beautiful and intense as mine was at home, dream birth.), integrating new angel baby with older angel babies,” she continued. “Marriage. All kinds of PTSD triggers. Overstimulation. This body. Attempting to crawl back to some semi-recognizable configuration.”
But this isn’t Alanis’s first battle with PPD. The last time she went through PPD, Alanis waited 16 months before she got help. In June, she told SELF magazine that was not a decision she would make this time. Her experience dealing with PPD twice before means this time she’s got bigger toolboxes in terms of emotional understanding from herself and help she can seek from others.
“I saw how things got richer after I came through it the last two times,” she wrote. “There is so much more support this time. I knew better, so I set it up to win as much as I could beforehand. Support. Food. Friends. Sun. Bio-identical hormones and SSRI’s at the ready. Some parts of the care-prep has been a godsend, and well-planned.
“But for all of this preparation – PPD is still a sneaky monkey with a machete – working its way through my psyche and body and days and thoughts and bloodwork levels. I have stopped, this time, in the middle of it. Lord knows I don’t want to miss a thing… with my kids.”
This time, Alanis said she was motivated to speak out not just because she wants other women to know they’re not alone, but she said she is also upset that “this culture is not set up to honor women properly after birth.”
“I see it changing, which is so heartening… but the general way is bereft of the honoring and tenderness and attunement and village-ness that post-partum deeply warrants,” she wrote.
Aside from taking care of Winter, Alanis has been working on a new album, which she started recording in Los Angeles in June. It doesn't have a title or release date yet.